Tuesday, January 2, 2018

Happy 2018

I haven't written a thing for a long time. Today I was thinking it was about time to add some unnecessary noise to the universe and since you have arrived at this page and are either very bored, have no real life, or are an evil robot, here you go.

I used to think that people used to sing the song about forgetting "old acquaintances" never made much sense. Why should we forget old friends? But people sing it anyway. Some people drink a lot of drinks and make a fool of themselves and I guess I really don't think they care anyway. What a waste. Most of us (including me) are capable of making a fool out of ourselves with out spending all that money on alcohol.

bad hair is in the eye of the beholderI am almost 10 SL years old. Wow. What have I learned? Nothing really. But I do know that hair is important. As you all know the world is constantly under threat by people with bad hair. I think everyone should wear the hairstyle that expresses their personality, etc. But yikes! What is going on in the world? Everyone freaks out about world leaders these days, and perhaps with justification. But my theory is that humans who are basically mentally ill have been gravitating into positions of power ever since the first humans got together.

A zillion years ago (perhaps just several hundred thousand) humans were looking at the dangers around them and all said "we best form human civilization or we will be eaten by saber toothed tigers".  Preferring not to be eaten by saber toothed tigers our ancestors invented human civilization on the spot. One small problem, they needed a leader. A weirdo caveman named Ogg stood up and proclaimed he was going to make civilization great again. All the others said "Hey how can civilization be made great again when it hasn't been invented yet?", but Ogg was not concerned with details. Others were worried that Ogg did not have all his rocks so to speak. Ogg also had weird hair.

Another subject of no importance to add more nonsense to this post is the issue of socks and flip flops. Question one. Who came up with the name "flip flops"? I wonder if people in other parts of the world call them flip flops? I have heard some people call them thongs. If you search "thongs" you get tiny swimwear that can not be worn north of Miami because people in the upper States freak out when they see too much of a human body. Actually I guess the current temperature in January plays a role too.

Anyway to question two on the sock/flip flop issue. In Japan (along with many other countries) people do not wear shoes in the house. This is the most sensible, civilized idea that any group has brought to the great idea table of humanity. It is disgusting to walk around on the sidewalk stepping on all sorts of who knows what, and bringing that into your home. But when you do need to go out to take the trash out one does need to wear some flip flops. This is where my problem comes in. (Actually as I think about it, it is a "problem" not a "question", however I started this paragraph as a "question" so I will let this editorial oversight stay.) If you are wearing socks and need to slip into (oh no - I just remembered in Hawaii they call them "slippers" I think) some sole protection, one must put one's finger between the big toe and its smaller neighbors to make an indentation. This sort of works but not so great. I have found that as long as you don't need to run away from a saber toothed tiger, or a person with bad hair you should be OK.

Well I think this post has manged to turn into still another useless waste of valuable Internet resources.  So dear readers please enjoy the new year and hope the coming year treats you well. 

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Extra, Extra, News Reporter Gets Exclusive Scoop!

Hello dear readers. A long time ago in the movies (where I seem to get most of my view of reality I guess) newspaper boys with hats turned sideways would run up and down the street yelling "Extra, extra, read all about it". I am not sure why they said "Extra, extra" but they must have had a reason. Maybe it meant they had an extra big paper that day because of the big news story. Anyway I digress.

The other day as I was walking around dressed as a flying cat. I am not sure why I made up a flying cat, but it sort of seemed to be a cool idea at the time. Anyway I just happened to see someone I had seen on TV, thus I knew he must be important since being on TV makes all people important. I thought I should try my had at being a news reporter and ask some serious questions. So I changed from a flying cat into a sort of preppy looking guy since I knew people were not as willing to give flying cats an interview.

Here is my EXCLUSIVE interview. You can re-print it if you are the Washington Post, or CNN or something like that. Just be sure to give me a by-line. Speaking of lines, my line is the part that says "Reporter", although you probably can figure that part out.

Reporter: Mr. DT, welcome to virtual reality.

The D: Thank you, as you know I am winning big, really big.

Reporter: Yes we can see. Why do you think that is?

The D: Well as you know I know how to get things done.

Reporter: How do you get things done?

The D: Well it's easy. All you need to do is think you are doing things and they will get done by magic. That's how I made millions.

The Reporter: Yeah but didn't some businesses fail?

The D: Sure, but that's business. The important thing is to have a big ego. And I have that. I mean I really have that. A big, and I mean really big ego. This country needs someone with a big ego. And I mean really big. I can negotiate great deals with other countries because my ego is bigger than other leaders. And so are my hands.

The Reporter: I heard that many women don't like how you come across. Do you think you need to worry about the female vote?

The D: That's ridiculous. Women love me. They absolutely love me.

The Reporter: But if you have enough money are you sure those aren't "professional" women who "love" you?

The D: Success is all a mater of having the power to deny the obvious. Just think about it. I look at myself it the mirror. I still think that I am that handsome man I was 40 years ago. I don't see any hair loss. I can't see my puffy belly. I have the power to deny the obvious. Women may think I am a jerk. Once again I have the power to deny the obvious.

The Reporter:  Well I guess am speechless so I will have to end the interview.

Reporters footnote: News reporters drink a lot of coffee. I found this last image on the Internet, so please forgive me for stealing it but it was really a cool little cartoon picture.


Friday, August 14, 2015

Dancing at the MAxx Dome and Sinkholes

I haven’t written anything for a zillion years. I know it. The Internet is filled with dead blogs, blogs that started out with the bloggers typing away thinking they may be the next William Shakespeare or something, and then the blogger goes off into blog limbo land. People who are reading the blog say “I wonder why this blog just stopped? Perhaps the blogger was abducted by space people in a flying saucer or stepped in a sink hole”.

Speaking of sink holes, this sinkhole came up as a topic at a dance I went to. I will get to it later. Since you have gotten this far in this post you probably have nothing better to do than to sit at your computer reading a bunch of nonsense — you are obviously not busy saving the world from evil, curing incurable diseases, or feeding your cat — so here it all comes.

Tonight I thought I would look around to find a dance to go to. I saw a place but I wasn’t sure if anyone spoke English. Sometimes I get nervous about doing things that may make me feel like a dingbat. In fact I will bet a lot of people are afraid of doing things that may make them look like a dingbat. (I am not exactly sure what a “dingbat” is — does it mean bats in the belfry?) Anyway there are times in a person’s life when you must just simply not allow your inner dingbat bell to ring, and have no fear of what people think.

So I went to a place called the Maxx Dome, I think it is run by Jimmy Gracemount. I took a picture and put it at the top. I think I mentioned several years ago how I learned to be a very bad photographer. I never wanted to waste good film, since it was so expensive, so my photographer technique was to get everything into one shot. The result was a bunch of pictures where people had little tiny microscopic heads and you could not tell who they were. Even though you got more bang for the buck as they say, the result was not as interesting as photos of people where you could actually see who they were. This resulted in torture for the poor souls who were forced to endure photo albums of page after page of microscopic heads with stick arms and legs in strange places that were not clear either. Anyway as you can see from the top I was back to my old habits. So I took another picture (left) of a fantasy outfit I threw together from some interesting freebie clothes to make the blog page visually more interesting. When I was a kid learning to read I always like to see some pictures in the book because at the time I thought it was like swimming without a nearby float if the page were nothing but words. And even if you didn’t know the words you could look at the picture to understand what the words were going to say. Perhaps it built some confidence or something. And of course one never wants to feel that they are a dingbat.

Anyway at the dance Chris Blackheart mentioned the sinkhole in the link above. I thought there was a Beatles’ song about holes in Manchester, but I was wrong. It was four thousand holes in Blackburn Lancashire. Anyway again I guess it wasn’t that important. And anyway number three I think I will put this post to bed, as they say in the newspaper biz.

Monday, October 13, 2014

Smarty Pants and Stupid Heads

If you have just started to read this post you may be thinking "as I am now spending my valuable time running my eyeballs across these words and attempting to glean a potential meaning, I wonder if this cerebral activity is of any value to my goal as a fulfilled human at one with the cosmos or is this simply a waste of resources that will have the same effect as eating potato chips and watching dribble on TV"? - then I will tell you to read no further. I fully intend to waste your time on another useless post.

I have not been in SL for a while. If you look at the last time I said anything you will think I vanished. But I came back the other night and found a whole lot of stuff was sort of different. A lot of my landmarks changed. When I went there I found they were turned into Walmarts and stuff.

Anyway I wonder why people say such and such is a "smarty pants" and such and such is a "stupid head"? I would think pants are not smart, and a head is smart. In fact the more I think of this, I think "speedy pants" comes in as another expression into this soup of goofy glob.

My friend Leigh Eel was on the other night but I didn't get to spend much time with him since it was late. He is a centaur. That is quite a classical thing to be. But when I was a kid I used to think about centaurs sometimes. If the neck is a human torso and they have four legs then they have six appendages if you count the arms, sort of like and an insect. I guess in ancient Greece they didn't waste time thinking of that. I guess they need all their legs for standing and stuff.

This leads me to a concern I always had about cartoons. I thought it was weird that Donald Duck only had three fingers. Someone told me that it made it easier to draw and since Walt Disney paid by the finger he ordered only three finger characters. Walt believed in pinching his pennies I guess.

Anyway by the time you have gotten to this part of the post you have come to the realization that you have wasted your time reading a complete bunch of nonsense. Thank you for reading.

Friday, September 6, 2013

Triangle Cars

Life is just this merry-go-round that keeps going and going, that can go fast and slow. Once I saw this Alfred Hitchcock movie where a bad guy pulled the speed control of a merry-go-round to the fast speed and all the children started screaming. Also once I saw an old cartoon where the merry-go-round went so fast it flew up into outer space. But I guess the lesson is that the merry-go-rounds can slow down too.

Since my merry-go-round seemed to slow, I took a few minutes and came into existence in SL. In fact I came back the other day and forgot how to control stuff. I forgot what stuff to do to do what. It was just like being in a car but forgetting how to drive. I saw my friend Franziskus Ninetails who I have known for a zillion years and said hello.

Not remembering how to do things and driving cars made me think of how people in some countries drive on the right and some on the left. That in itself would make me confused but having a car with the driver's side on the left rather than the right (eek - I mean right rather than left ) would blow my mind I think. I think if you could hold a mirror against your head it would be easier.

So I came up with an invention that I call "Triangle Cars". These cars would not have a passenger seat next to the driver. The only seat would be for the driver, exactly in the center of the vehicle. When I am driving I don't want someone next to me talking because I am not so good a driver and need to focus on good driving techniques and not making chit-chat. I need to look straight ahead and watch out for fools. In the driving world most other drivers fall into the fool bucket.

These new cars would have only one front seat (for the driver) and 2 passenger seats in the back. That way the passengers could run their mouths about any goof ball craziness that popped into their heads and the driver would not have to listen. Since there was only one seat in the front and two in the back, they would be called triangle cars. The good feature is that the same car can be used for all countries. This could save a lot of money.

Well I am not sure if anybody reads any of this nonsense, but if you just did, thanks for reading.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Fork In The Road

Well I've been away for a while.

Once upon a time two guys were running a TV station and they were looking for something to put on the late-late-late show. There names were Joe and Moe. Actually there names are not really important, it's just that I wanted to give them names so you can put a visual picture in your head.

Anyway Joe said to Moe, "Hey what really old movie do you want to run tonight for the late-late-late show"?

Moe reached at the top shelve of the really old movie shelf and pulled a Jimmy Stewart movie about some guy who wishes he was never alive and an angel shows him what would happen if he were never alive. (now days everyone has seen that movie but this was before it was a cult classic)

The really goofy part of this is that the late-late-late show was in July not Christmas. Anyway in those days people didn't have anything better to do but stay up late watching old movies on TV.

But the really cool thing about this movie is that it was sort of like an episode of the Twilight Zone. It makes you think about how we run into certain people for some odd reason and wonder what would happen if you never ran into them.

Anyway this post really doesn't have too much of a point to it. Moe pulled the old movie in a can off the shelf and blew off the dust with a whale-like sound. That is because whales blow air out of their blow holes with a deep hiss sound. Thar she blows! Some people make whale sounds when they frustrated, blowing air out --- hiss! Anyway the whale noise has nothing to do with this story. This story is about the effect we have on other people and they have on us. Maybe we run into people by chance or maybe it is for some purpose.

Anyway I have had some things that have kept me away form SL, but went back the other day and spoke to my friend Leigh Eel. I was glad to see him. I hope to catch up with other people too.

A long time ago people used to write pop music all about mellow happy stuff, then a bunch of people with more of an edge came on the scene. I am not sure why people wrote songs about people they know that have died. but for reasons I don't understand this song always stuck in my mind. Don't get me wrong, I want to live a long time. It is sort of a odd way to cleanse yourself or something.

Well, sorry for sounding morbid, I really am in a happy state of mind. Thank you for reading.

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Some Things Have No Meaning

Once there was this really cool city where hamsters lived called Hamsterdam. When I first heard of the name in my brain I went to search and found that some one already thought of the name.

Oh well anyway I shall continue my story since if you go through life with the fear of not being original than you just go through life. Anyway these hamsters just ran on the wheel all day. One may come to the idea that running on the wheel is of no value but we humans go to stupid jobs, do stupid activities, and so on which is basically just running on the wheel just like hamsters.

I saw a show on Mark Twain on TV the other night. Everyone thought he was sort of a humorous writer but in the show he was very sad at the end of his life. His daughter and wife had died.

I guess life is up and down. Sometimes I think about the ancient Egyptians pharaohs and how they freaked out when they realized they would die and turn into dust and built giant pyramids. I guess since I had a philosophy that we only know people in slices, I am at a certain slice that is not typical of the complete package. This is just a normal thing we all think of, turning into dust and all that.

Anyway I wanted to put something up since Edie Haskell has a link to my site and he only links to people who stay current :-). Also I wanted to be sure all my friends are doing well. I hope everybody remembers what is really important in the world - Barbies that sing.
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